Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He shit in the fireplace
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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