you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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