Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
