I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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