so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
