Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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