If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
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