at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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