I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
should my penis look like a turkey
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
