She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize