just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
