are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize
