We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
my liver is dry heaving
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
