I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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