Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
