I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
