Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize