remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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