Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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