Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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