Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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