At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Sext me about skeletons
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
