ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
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