You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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