What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
