I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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