Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Randomize
