That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
