2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize