i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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