Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
