Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
handjob tips. give me some.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
