whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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