We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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