I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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