wake up i wanna do it froggy style
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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