The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
