jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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