is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
