i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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