I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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