Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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