i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize