I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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