Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Hippo gnu deer
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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