is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I love black thongs
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize