So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
