dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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