The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
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