Best friends brother. Beat that.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
