They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
